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Donald Trump’s Expertise - We’ve learned that Donald Trump hates expertise.It makes a person much harder to fleece.We’ve also learned that Trump’s well-known for fraudA practice, it seems, that he’ll never cease. Trump seems to think that he’s some sort of god.Therefore, his own judgement cannot be flawed.So, no one can tell him he’s… Read More

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  • Florida Man Celebrates Birthday by Stealing a Tourist Train. On Meth. Picks Up Passengers. April 13, 2026
    Most people celebrate their birthday with cake. Maybe a dinner out. Jonathan Patrick Winslow, 57, of Key West, chose differently. On July 4th — his birthday, and also America’s birthday, which feels significant — Winslow approached a Conch Tour Train employee, claimed he used to work there years ago, and asked for “a tour.” What […]
  • CONFIRMED: Jesus Has Been Spotted at the White House Easter Lunch April 9, 2026
    We’ve been waiting years for an official White House Jesus sighting. It happened on April 1st. Yes, April Fool’s Day. We cannot stress enough that this is not a joke. At a White House Easter lunch attended by over 100 faith leaders, Trump’s personal spiritual advisor Paula White-Cain stepped to the mic and compared the […]
  • JD Vance Is Writing a Book Called “Communion” and We Have Questions April 6, 2026
    The Vice President of the United States — a man theoretically responsible for being one heartbeat away from running the free world — has announced a new memoir. It’s called Communion: Finding My Way Back to Faith. It comes out in June. It’s 304 pages. He wrote it while in office. Let’s start with the […]
  • Vultures Led Cops to a Suitcase Full of Human Remains at a Place Called “The Compound” April 3, 2026
    Only in Florida does a murder investigation begin with a wildlife tip. Palm Bay, Florida. A 19-year-old named Lucas Sander Jones allegedly did what any reasonable person does when faced with a body disposal problem: stuffed the remains into suitcases and left them in a remote area of the city known — wait for it […]
  • 8 Million People Said “No Kings” on the Day We Celebrate a Guy Who Rode Into Jerusalem to Say Exactly That March 29, 2026
    On March 28th — Palm Sunday, for those keeping score — an estimated eight million Americans took to the streets in what organizers are calling the largest single-day protest in American history. The protest was called “No Kings.” Palm Sunday, in case you need the refresher, is the day Christians commemorate Jesus riding into Jerusalem […]